Welcome to the Marriage Ministry at The Retreat Center at St. John's. One may wonder why the Wedding Chapel at St. John's has a Marriage Ministry program. The simple response is that preparation for marriage does not begin 6 months before the wedding date and end the day of the wedding. A compilation of statistics have demonstrated that those marriages which not just survive the divorce statistic (currently 40 - 50% new marriages will end in divorce) but which thrive in marital satisfaction, are found by couples who avail themselves of pre-marriage counseling and a variety of resources and supports once married. In previous generations, there was the support of extended family, tighter sense of community belonging, and societal norms and mores which supported couples during stressful stages of the family life cycle. Today these supportive elements are often absent or inadequate resulting in a crisis of failure in marriage. (1.).

 

Research has indicated that 2 periods can be considered the most critical for the survival of marriages: (a) the first 7 years of marriage, during which half of all divorces are known to occur, and (b) the period during which the first child reaches 14 years of age, which has been suggested as a low point for marital satisfaction in the life course.(2.). Roughly two-thirds of divorces happen for reasons cited other than physical or emotional abuse: spouses grow apart, they disengage emotionally from one another, and they experience personality clashes, infidelity, communication problems, or financial difficulties.(3.).

 

The Pontifical Council for the Family and United States Conference of Catholic Bishops has recognized the importance of early preparation for marriage and ongoing marriage formation across the life span. They have identified four inter-related areas in which growth must continually occur to sustain healthy marriages: 1) Maturity – personal and social growth patterns; 2) Vision – of marriage itself and for our marriage specifically; 3) Skills – learned behaviors; 4) Community – supportive social and religious context.(4.). To this end, in 2005 the Catholic Bishops launched the National Pastoral Initiative for Marriage to call attention to the meaning and value of marriage for the Church and society. As a part of the Initiative, the Family and Marriage Committee launched a new website resource for couples of all faiths. You can check out the web page http://www.foryourmarriage.org/ for resources on all sorts of marital topics—blending personalities, disillusionment, infertility, infidelity, intimacy, and values to name but a few— plus daily marriage tips, a marriage quiz, inspirational stories, and more ways to care for your marriage.  

 

The program goal of the Marriage Ministry at St. John Chapel is to prepare couples for the sacrament of marriage and to offer resources and programming for the ongoing formation of married couples in their vocation of marriage, as an adjunct to their home parish participation and supports. You can check on our Events for a schedule of current program offerings.

 

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